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Posts Tagged ‘true Joy’

Have you ever prayed that God would use you?  I started praying this a couple of years ago.  I just had this strong desire to be used by my Creator.  It felt like there was something important missing from my life, like I was missing the point to life itself.

Here in America, most of us are raised hearing about and being groomed for the “American Dream”.  We’re taught that success is getting in to a “good” college and then later landing a dream job and making a lot of money, getting married, buying a house in an affluent neighborhood, driving a certain type of car, having children, and even more recently having the right type of cell phone ( you know… the “smart” kind).  During all of that you’re also to begin storing up money in some time of retirement account so you’ll be able to continue having all the best money can buy even when the time comes that you no longer work.

I didn’t follow along strictly to the above guidelines in my life and for many years felt mostly like a huge disappointment.  I felt like I was less than those that did.  I wondered about that.  Somehow it didn’t seem right that money alone could make us successful or worth greater value as people.  The whole thing felt like a lie to me.

One of my parents believed in God and tried to teach me about Him as best as they knew how, while the other wanted to believe in a made up version that suited the preferred lifestyle.  And even though I’d been off and on raised in churches and knew a few things about Jesus, my teen years were sadly spent far far from Him.  Yet He was never far from me it turns out.

I believe He’s never far from any of us.  We may be running from Him at times, or maybe we’ve spent our whole life running from Him, or even have never known Him at all…. but He knows every single one of us and is with each one until the very day that we die.  He’s always there, waiting on us to “see” Him and take His hand and be led by Him to follow Him into His will.  We just have to choose to do so.

During my adult years Jesus has been right beside me, gently whispering to me to “come home” to Him.  Many times I would faintly hear Him, but then life would crowd out His voice again.  Still, He never once gave up on me.  He’s like that you know.  He never gives up on us.

A few years ago He used a woman, a friend, to show Himself to me through her and I’ve never been the same since.  She quite simply lived in a way that I’d never seen anyone else live.  His love and light shined through her, regardless of her circumstances, and I wanted that same love for myself.  I saw what being close to Jesus could mean and I craved that closeness.  His acceptance and His love.

It’s been a journey, these past few years.  I love the way He doesn’t force Himself on us, but instead is such a gentleman in the truest sense.  He courts us lovingly and waits patiently while we make mistake after mistake, wrong choice after wrong choice.  It seems that every time I think I’ve gotten it figured out, He shows me that I’m so very mistaken all over again and he beckons me closer so I can learn.

He’s now answering my prayer to be used by Him.  It’s a dangerous prayer it turns out.  He will gladly take you up on it if you ask Him.  He’s using other people who have prayed the same thing to show me, and lead, and guide me to where He wants me to be.  It’s an amazing thing to watch unfold over time.  I’m learning more and more, every single day, to be more obedient, to say “Yes, Lord” more quickly, and to see Him outside of the box that He’s put into so often here in America.

I can’t wait to see what He brings into my tomorrows.

“But even more blessed are all who hear the word of God and put it into practice.” ~ Jesus ♥ Luke 11:28

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